A MESSAGE TO MY AFRICAN SISTERS

MY AFRICAN SISTER!

There’s something unique about African ladies. I don’t know if I’m the only one who considers African ladies to be the most beautiful. I’m not being a racist but there are unique features I have observed in my African sisters that I must address. I’m an African, a patriotic citizen of Kenya, but this doesn’t mean I despise people from other races, no, not at all. I am an advocate of equality, justice and freedom from all social evils, including racism.

Over the past few years, I have observed that Europeans, Americans, Indians, Asians, among other foreigners who dwell in Kenya enter marriages with Kenyans. This is true, isn’t it? Have you ever wondered why? Maybe you don’t need to. Our African sisters are born with a natural ability to perfectly take care of a husband. They know exactly the parts to play in a man’s life. They know that marriage is not just about love, it’s more than love. I can’t dare think that these people can never find women in their countries who can match the African beauties. It is the care, the ‘more than just love’ attribute that attracts them to my African sisters. Big up African Ladies.   

I have no problem with an African becoming a good and loving wife to a foreigner, neither do I criticize the fact that they make very good wives. I do have a problem with these African sisters of mine being consumed by being a lady that it hinders them even from critical thinking and reasoning by themselves. The attitude of “I’m just a girl, please do this for me” is what I hate in you my African sister. When you think that you’re a woman and that you have the right to be subjected to lighter activities, you’re wrong. When you think that some activities or priorities are only meant for the men, you’re wrong. When you think that being a woman means being dependent on a man your entire life, you’re wrong. When you think that life is a smooth line where everything just happens, or somebody makes them happen for you, you’re terribly wrong my sister.

Tegla Lourupe Peace Academy, she's an advocate of peace.

I don’t deny that women should be subjects to their husbands, they should, for that was actually God’s original plan during creation. The Bible clearly states that women should respect their husbands, of what benefit is it to defy this? But no phrase in the Bible states that women should be totally dependent on their husbands, or that women have no free will, or that women should be subjected to lighter activities. Women have the same chances in the society as men. Ladies have the same opportunities in the society as the young men. In fact, policies implemented by the government such as setting university cut-off points for girls to be lower than that of boys should be discouraged and abolished. It makes our sisters weaker, because they think even the government recognizes the fact that they’re weaker than boys (I’m not referring to physical strength here). 

My African sister, I know you’re very beautiful, you can never forget that of course. I have no problem with your beauty. But I do have a problem with you being consumed with your beauty that you spend 50% of your time grooming yourself. You have a boyfriend, or a husband, he already loves you, what does it benefit you to be sexually attractive or ‘hot’ to every other man? When you’re consumed with your beauty, I will not lie to you, you will not think and your reasoning will be wanting. That is when you end up posting on your social media walls, “I like being myself, don’t judge me” just because a friend has questioned your dressing, or “Me, myself and I, self-love” accompanied with a photo of your booty. I have no problem with the posts on your social media walls, but I do have a problem with the content, because it discloses everything that goes on in your egocentric ‘feministic’ mind.

Opportunities present themselves equally to men as to women. If you ever thought you’ll have a special advantage just because you’re a lady, think again. If anything has been deceiving you that you just have to work a little because you’re a lady, I’m sorry. Think about this, who is that employer who will choose a beautiful woman instead of a competent, fruitful and promising young man. My sister, your beauty is only important to you and your husband/ boyfriend. I can’t imagine how lost you are if you ever think of using your beauty and or body to obtain favors from employers and/or other important people. Anything that is obtained in unlawful way will be lost in a miserably and shameful way, your job or whichever kind of favor you obtain by means of giving away your body is not an exception. You have to work tirelessly hard just as men do. There are ladies who have made it in the fields you fear getting into, in the activities you fear trying. You can too, only if you burry your gender.

Prof. Wangari Maathai.

Think of Ada Lovelace, the very first computer programmer to exist, she developed the ADA programming language, despite being a lady. Do you know Grace Hopper, the Mathematics professor who developed the COBOL programming language? Bringing things closer home, consider Wangari Maathai, Kenyan-born environmentalist, pro-democracy activist and women’s rights campaigner, who was awarded the Nobel Prize. Don’t forget Tegla Loroupe, the Kenyan athlete who held the women marathon record and won several prestigious marathons, who has now become a very influential advocate of peace. If you want sit back and relax and wait for things to be done for you, think of Martha Karua, the outstanding politician who can be courageous enough to compete with seven men for presidency. Think of Malala Yousafzai, the 20-year-old Indian Pakistani schoolgirl who defied threats of the Taliban to campaign for the right to education, and has now become a global advocate for women’s rights especially the right to education. These are some of the features I admire in the woman who raised me, Monica Ogweno. She deserves to be mentioned among strong and powerful women, big up mama.

Grace Hopper, the developer of COBOL programming language.

Ada Lovelace, the first computer programmer

Tegla Lourupe, the athlete.

Monica Ogweno, the strong woman who raised me.

Finally, my African sisters, we part ways when you cannot effectively balance your emotions and your reasoning. Men are considered to be better critical thinkers than women because they never let their emotions come before their brain. I do say the difference between men and boys is that men control their bodies while boys are controlled by their bodies. Now the difference between a woman and a girl is that women can effectively balance their emotions with their reasoning while girls can’t. Just as it is not strange to find a 35-year-old boy, it isn’t strange to find a 40-year-old girl. When your emotions control you, you render yourself a servant of the body, and your reasoning becomes totally unemployed. When you try to reason too much and take not heed of your emotions, you lose your womanhood. Being a woman means considering the two, and balancing them, and ignoring any whenever it is necessary.

Martha  Karua, the confident female Kenyan politiian

Malala Youszfzai, the Indian feminist.

My African sister, if you can make the necessary corrections, you will become an ideal woman, not just a good wife, but a good member of the society. You will become an embodiment of true feminism; a feminist who understands what womanhood means, the one who advocates for gender equality to mean gender equality, not favor for women even when they don’t deserve. Don’t worry, don’t doubt yourself, change is real and inevitable, you can change.